Jerk Store: The Plastic Stapler

I tried to staple 5 sheets at once and my plastic stapler committed suicide…

Why its a jerk:
This is the first inanimate object to be placed into the Jerk Store and frankly I am sad that it took this long for a non-person to get my ire up enough for entrance. Why plastic staplers? Because the one function they are designed to complete they absolutely can’t do. The purpose of a stapler is to place a thin piece of steel wire through multiple sheets of paper so as to hold them together in an orderly fashion. A simple task that we have assigned to this ubiquitous office tool to make our office lives more orderly since its invention in 1866 by Joan Barbour. If you own a cheap government surplus stapler then you probably know where I am going with this. Some time after the 1960’s (I’m guessing) staplers started being produced in plastic rather than the five pounds (approximate) of iron that was the normal construction. This new plastic construction means that you can’t staple more than 2 sheets of 8.5×11 recycled printer paper together. That’s effective.

I currently have a full metal construction Swingline that is painted what I like to call “Bureaucrat Gray.” That mother can staple though inch thick sheet metal and I have taken it with me as I have transferred jobs on three occasions. I would give up a beloved family member before I would trade it in for a POS plastic one. Let’s just say that I understand where Milton from Office Space is coming from. But seriously why do they continue to make those shitty plastic staplers and why do we as consumer buy these “paper weights?”

Fuck you plastic staplers and welcome to the Jerk Store.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Rock Bottom

This is what it’s like to be a Pittsburgh Pirates fan…

At 12:32 this afternoon I got this via email from a friend. (Editor’s note: We were forwarded the e-mail and photos below from a friend who did not credit the author…we believed them to be our friend’s words and pictures – – we were wrong.  The italicized words below belong to Dejan Kovacevic of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)

12:14: p.m.: The Pirates have closed the upper deck for today’s game a move unprecedented in PNC Park’s history.  Actual turnout is expected to be extremely light, despite an advance sale of more than 12,000 tickets, in large part because of the G-20 summit.  The team is passing out certificates to any fans with upper-deck seats to “Plese enjoy a seat upgrade, courtesy of the Pirates.”  As this is being typed, there might not be 200 people here.

Ladies and Gentlemen…your 2009 Pittsburgh Pirates!!!

As a Pirate fan I have laid claim to seeing rock bottom on several occasions.  But this one takes the cake. I know that the G-20 summit is wreaking total havoc on the city and even if you had tickets to today’s game you are not going to fight the traffic snarls to get a seat to see this ball club. They are 3-22 over the past 25 games. That is a .120 winning percentage. If the Pirates lose today’s12:35 game they will have been swept (again) by the Reds (again). Things have been characterized as “epically bad” and “historically terrible” for the Pittsburgh Pirates for so long that you begin to forget just how bad things really are. The city could not get over the baseball season soon enough and how can you blame them with the Super Bowl defending Steelers and the Stanley Cup defending Penguins coming back. Since football fever has set in, everyone has completely abandoned the Pirates…and rightfully so.

It just pains me to watch this team be so inept. There was an opportunity for today and they blew it. After drawing a total of 4,000 fans (that’s butts in the seats) for the last two games combined, they should have thrown open today’s gates and given the seats away for free. No one was going to come anyway. If you live on the south or eastern side of the city you can’t get to the North Shore and PNC Park but the news would have shown up to talk about it.  Western PA has G-20 fatigue. They would have appreciated the gesture even if they could not or did not take advantage of it. Bring back Buc’ night for today’s day game (one dollar soda and one dollar hotdogs). Anything…do anything to make people care! Just quit being so fucking BAD at running a baseball team… Please I beg you. I’m not sure I can take it any more.

UPDATE:  Here are the photos at gametime 



***Photos courtesy of Dejan Kovacevic of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Ménage à Trois – Episode 3

You still can’t believe you were able to convince the others to do it…but then it happened and luckily you had hit the record button so it was all saved for posterity.

The editors here at Daddy’s Sugar Ball our proud to release our third podcast and we’re now ready to let our loyal readers in on the discussion. Bearcat, ZJ, Max Power and special guest Spintrick had a lively beer-fueled discussion regarding the current sports and pop culture landscape.

The topics included for our third podcast were:

Intro
Girl of the Moment (0:45 min mark)
What we’re drinking (3:40 min mark)
NFL Preview (7:55 min mark)
People you are afraid of in the NFL (19:30 min mark)
Buffalo Wild Wings commercial (21:30 min mark)
Bloopers & Gag Reel (22:55 min mark)

And just like our typical posts here on a daily basis, we want to remind you our loyal listeners that at times we may use some profanity, so please be responsible when and where you listen.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…

Jerk Store: Jim Rome

Why he is a jerk:
While in the car yesterday driving across our beautifully potholed state I had a chance to listen to the Jim Rome radio show.   A couple of years back it was trendy to dump on Jim Rome for his in-your-face style and strange take on sports and its place in culture.  But after being relegated to the mid-afternoon non-rush hour and stuck in ESPN hell at 4:30 for Rome is Burning he is pretty irrelevant at this point, so people backed off. I had totally forgotten about him until yesterday.

What was really irritating about his radio show was the way he totally hacked up the English language. Now I am all for poetic license and as ZJ will be quick to point out I don’t edit or care for complete sentences in first or second drafts.  But the abuse via the spoken word by Rome is unreal. Here is an example where Jim Rome reads some emails from his loyal listeners who obviously love his style and attempt to imitate the delivery via these letters:

*Interpretation in parentheses where possible

Rome: Let’s see what the electronic pony express has pounded into my iMac’s inbox. Seven Pack from Los Ang-go-lino smoke signaled this:

Mr. Seven Pack: JR!!! All Hail Mary and Stanford Band to you. (This is somehow a greeting) I was televised the Denver Game this past football worshipping non-workday and SLAMMO! The way that gladiator grudge match ended defined my religion… straight belt buckle. (The Denver-Cincy game had an exciting ending… belt buckle)

Rome: I could NOT agree more. If you are Cincy then you were punked. If you were not Cincy then you sat and watched as a team’s manhood was removed and burned at the stake in the end zone by horses. I like where you come from Seven Pack. Straight belt buckle is right and I would add that it was also wooden picture frame! Next email is from Magic Wonder Thrust from Red Sox Beantown part’s unknown.

Magic Wonder Thrust: Rome. Serena. Williams. Ball. Throat. Threat. Kill. Banned. Australian Open. (Either 1. this was just how it was written or 2. Rome just picked random words from MWT’s email.)

Rome: Emotion gets up inside tennis players. If Big Mac-Enroe had dropped this flavor on a line judge we would be going unranked vs. top ten upset as we march out the goal posts but since it was female tennis we go all Detroit Pistons-Indiana Pacers. If you want to call the rules then call the rules, but at least know that refereeing a Serena Williams match might result in you getting tennis elbow down your throat. I suggest that the next time you drop some British sterling on this match and wait for the pot roast to sizzle like paint chips. (I would interpret this for you but my brain’s just leaked out of my head) That’s it for today. I’m Jim Rome and I am out like a boner in sweatpants.

After listening to this crap for 20 minutes I was nearly ready to swerve into oncoming traffic. Lucky for you the loyal DSB readers you don’t have to suffer the same fate. Avoid Jim Rome at all costs. It just might save your life.

If that was not reason enough for Jerk Store enrollment then this classic YouTube.com video of his interview with Jim “Chris” Everett certainly is.

Thanks for coming and suckling on Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

People You See At The Football Game…

Back in June I did a rundown of the people you see at the baseball game. Today I will give you a rundown of the people you see at football games.  Yeah…some of it is just regurgitated from the prior post… but I don’t care; it’s not like you are paying for these crappy posts.

D-Fence
These guys is uber-creative.  D and his buddy Fence are a the dynamic duo of game day sign making.  The desperation to get themselves on TV and the need to fire up the football team has these guys living for the D – FENCE chant and will try to get it started at every turn while their team defends the field. These guys also can be seen with such creative signs as “Sportscenter is next” or “TO has BO!”  I could really do without these D-Bags.

Mr. Clueless

Did the running back just score a home run?

If you get stuck going to a game with this guy he will ruin the whole experience for you. He does not know what is going on.  He does not pay attention.  He will ask you to explain such complex concepts as the extra point attempt after a touchdown and the coin flip.  If this were the hot chick (see below) then it would be understandable but somehow this 30 something American male has made it this far in life with out knowing if the football is stuffed or blown up.  Indefensible.

Lives and Dies with Every Down
Much like his baseball equivalent this guy believes that his team is either going to the Super Bowl after a 13 yard first down completion or headed for the first pick in next years draft following a sack or fumble.  During his lifetime his team has never won a playoff game beyond the first round.  He knows mostly futility.  To describe this guy’s marriage to his football in one word:  Pain.  Usually a fan of Cleveland, Raiders, Lions, Eagles, and most certainly Buffalo.

The Drunk

I will keep going to the Hoff until you tell me to stop…

This man lives for the four o’clock game.  That’s three more hours of drinking!  Prime time games are his holy grail.  Tailgating is basically an all day binge-fest that involves drinking massive quantities of cheap beer.  On the way to his seat he will “slam” that pocket bottle of Canadian Club and attempt to sneak in a couple extra beers in his secret jacket pockets.  This guy is the reason you should never take children to a football game.  There are just too many of these guys at the games.  They will spew vitriolic hatred to all.  Avoid this fan.

The TV Celebrity Wanna-Be

This guy just wants to get on TV.  ESPN, CBS, and Fox are always going to the stands with the camera so as to give the viewer at home look at the excitement the ticket paying fans are feeling.  It is mostly a sales job to help the NFL ticket booths, but it has created a breed of fans that spend the couple of hours they are at the game every Sunday trying to get on either the Jumbotron or TV set.  You see this guy trying to get attention via his sweet throwback jersey and constantly has his cell phone at the ready waiting for his buddies to inform him that he is now a TV star.

The Costumed Freak
This is the guy who still dresses up like a Kiss Army reject in the Black Hole and sees going to football games as a chance to act like a complete lunatic.  Other examples: the guys who dress like Vikings, the Dog Pound fat ass that eats milk bones, the Jets Fireman (might be the only truly hated NYC Fireman) and those cross dressing Redskins fans with pig noses (WTF?).  I hate all these guys.

The Bag People
Might be my favorite breed of football fan.  They are so embarrassed by their team that they feel the need to hide their face while in attendance.  They are season ticket holders that are so ravaged by the utter futility of their team that they feel the need to place paper bags over their heads (in the case of Lions fans – – sometimes plastic).  They have been seen at Tampa Bay, New Orleans, Oakland and most recently at Detroit.  I so love the Bag People.  Next stop?  Cincinnati.

The Jumbotron Watcher

Did you just see that play? I just paid $200 to watch it on a really big TV that is really far away.

This guy is so conditioned to watching Football on TV that now that he can go to a game where he spends the entire time fixated on the Jumbotron.  It is surreal to me that this guy will spend the entire game watching it not play out in front of him, but on a TV screen that is broadcasting what is happening.  He might as well have stayed home.  He deserves the neck cramp that he will have when he leaves the game.  By the way this describes 90% of all Dallas fans.

The Heckler

This guy buys into that whole 12th man thing. Number 8! You’re a FAG! My sister can take a hit better than you can! He is waging psychological warfare against the opponent at every turn.  He paid extra money just so that he could get front row seats behind the opponent’s bench. Hey 22 can you read? He will weave a colorful (blue) story regarding the backup QB’s mother and how much he enjoyed spending last night with her. Panther swiped your mom! If he is from Boston, expect a racist tinge that will cause you to lose faith in your fellow man.  If you are a fan of the visiting team best avoid this asshole at all costs. You’re in my house homo!  Your team is nothing but ass-pirates!

The Hot Chick

I should have gone to Okla(.)(.)homa…

Usually only seen during the first 6-7 weeks in northern football cities, year round in the south this former high school or college cheerleader goes to the game to be seen.  She will dress in a manner totally inappropriate for the event or the weather.  It doesn’t matter – – you are going to spend the TV timeouts checking her out.  If you are a J-E-T-S Jets, Jets, Jets fan then you will be sure to accost her at Gate B after she refuses to flash you and your friends.

Thanks for coming and suckling on Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Running Diary: Steelers v. Titans

Welcome to the first Steelers Running Diary of the 2009 season.  If you have been a DSB follower going back to our blogger.com days then you know that on occasion I will watch the Steelers’ primetime games with the laptop and give you my thoughts on the game and the broadcast as it’s happening.

8:00 The Black Eyed Peas kick it off in Point State Park across the river from Heinz Field.  There are plenty of Terrible Towels waving in the crowd.  Holy shit, I am ready for “The Defense.”  That’s what I am calling this season.  It seems appropriate.  Given the title defense and the hard-nosed Steelers’ defense.

8:05  Nancy O’Dell from Access Hollywood is the host for the kick-off concert.  Don’t ask me why. She says that there are 60,000 people in the park.  There will be fewer people packed into Heinz Field. Damn…Pittsburgh is pumped up for this season.

8:10  Fergie and her meth face are scaring the crowd.  HD is not her friend.  If they give her another close up I might consider changing the channel until kick-off.  I am actually trying to decide what is worse…her voice minus the studio auto-tune or her face in HD?  Either way she should be avoiding live appearances.   I wish Shawn Merriman would show up and go ‘roid rage on Fergie.

8:15  The Herm Edwards “We Play to WIN the game” Coors light commercial is awesome.  Favorite Coors Light Coach press conference commercial? Maybe?  I need to see if it stands up over the course of the season as well as the original clip.

8:17  Tim McGraw?  I envy the deaf.

8:26 After waiting 7 months for football to return why does the NFL force me to put up with this crap before the game?  And why does NBC have to make the games so gay?

8:31  YES… FOOTBALL is finally back.  Our long national nightmare is over.  Damn the city looks great.

8:33 I am going on record right now.  Steelers will finish the season 13-3.  You heard it here first.

8:42 Kickoff… a 40 yard return to start the Steelers season… that is what you like to see.

8:44 3 and out but Sepulveda is able to pin them inside the 5… I freaking love that guy. My hope for the defense today is that Woodley hits Kerry Collins so hard that he starts hitting the bottle again.

8:55 Text message from Max Power confirms that he is a fan of Fox’s Glee… in other news, apparently the sky is blue.

8:58 From a makeable distance, Rob Bironas misses.  0-0 Dodged a little bullet on that one after only missing 4 of 72 in his career from inside 40 yards.

9:02 Another sack… that one was not Big Ben holding the ball too long.  Looks like it will be more of the same of the offense after these first couple of series.  Have I mentioned how much I hate these Toyota Prius commercials?  Those stupid people dressed up as trees, flowers grass and the freaking sun… it sucks.  It irritates the shit out of me.  My guess is that is not the basis for an effective advertising campaign.

9:10 ONE HANDED INT BY #43!!! That is why you pay him the big bucks!  An awesome INT by Polamalu.  ZJ just informed me via text that Polamalu is the 2009 Defensive MVP… I agree.

9:14 After two plays, Big Ben over throws Holmes and gets picked off… its a stupid throw.  WTF was he doing?

9:23 Hey rest of the NFL…the Pittsburgh Steelers still do not have a running game again this season…

9:41 After driving 60 yards the Steelers Defense holds in the red zone and setup the Titans for a field goal.  Bironas this time GETS BLOCKED.  Still no score in the game.  This defensive battle is awesome to watch for Steelers fans but it has to be killing NBC and the NFL brass that this is not a scoring fest.

9:51 Holmes with a TD and 85 yards in the first half means 15 fantasy points!  Looks like he is the #1 WR option for the Steelers this year.

9:55 And how does the Steelers defense back up the offense?  By giving up a big play to a nobody WR… Britt for a huge gain and then Gage with a TD.  48 seconds left on the clock.  Should the Steelers just take a knee?

10:22 Twitter from a Steelers followers seems to show that Troy Polamalu is going to be ok.  Polamalu is listed as questionable to return in the second half according to SNFSideline Twitter.

10:25 Bo Scaife has had an intense first half and now he is looking like he might be headed to the IR after getting his knee bent the wrong way.  He turned the ball over because he is too much of a pussy to hold on to it.  Scaife owners are now looking at the Free Agent list on their fantasy football league webpages.  Comcast and their third world internet crashes after dozens of people attempt to log on at once.

10:30 After two solid hours of NBC football, I don’t miss John Madden… not even a little bit.

10:31 Surrogates looks good right?  We are ready for a new Bruce Willis movie to kick ass, right?  I am excited for it.

10:46 This game has had more illegal formation penalties than catches by WRs… WTF is so hard about lining up on the line of scrimmage?

11:02 #43 is still in the locker room with no further update.  The Titans are up 10-7 and on a scale of 1-10 of worry I am at 4.5…  not like you are still reading at this point.  But keep in mind the Steelers came from behind in a third of their games last year…

11:06 Favre spoofs his own on-again-off-again career in a Sears commercial.  The only part of it that surprises me is that he is not wearing the number 4 t-shirt from the Wrangler Jeans commercial.

11:17 Jeff Reed, the Paper Towel Dispenser Destroyer, ties the game at 10 a piece.  Holding steady at a 3 on the worry scale.  The Defense will be able to hold.

11:24 The Defense holds… punt comes with 1:57 left on the clock and the Steelers have all three time outs.  The is Big Ben’s wheelhouse.  And the punt is shanked short and it is only a 28 yard boot… Great field position.

11:27 Three straight completions to move the chains each time.  This is why Big Ben is the heart of the Pittsburgh Steelers.  This is awesome to watch.

11:29 Ward fumbles…. this is breaking the hearts of all within Steeler Country.  #$@#&!!!  Now we need to hope for OT.  Why did Ward not go down?  Why do you try to force it into the end zone when it helps you to have the first down and then run the clock out until you can kick it?  This is going to kill me all night if they lose.

11:34 We are headed to OVERTIME… free football everybody and this means more chances for our fantasy football players to run it up.  And Pittsburgh will get the ball…. I am officially at 7 on the worry scale.

11:42 Ben is working it down the field… this looks pretty good.

11:47 After working down the field and getting the first down at the 15 yard line via a catch by Rookie Mike “60 Minutes” Wallace… Reed comes on the field and hits a 33 yard kick for the win. Sweet.  Reed nailed it like it was a paper towel dispenser.

Where’s your Terrible Towel now LenWhale?

Thanks for coming and suckling on Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

The Not Quite Top Ten Top Ten: Mistakes You Should Avoid In College

10. Failing to study

Fail out and this is what you have to look forward to as a job…

You got by in high school on your good looks, your ability to steal notes and/or pure brain power.  High school is a cake walk compared to what you are facing in college.  While you may have enjoyed skating by in high school you will be required to do actual work to maintain a decent grade in every single class.  Going to class and not doing the reading or doing the reading and skipping class is not going to get it done.  As a college student you have more leisure time than a Roman Senator.  You have more down time now than you will at any time in your life.  You live independently and don’t have to even cook for yourself.  It’s like living in a nursing home but you are at a time in your life when you can enjoy it.  In order to maintain this freedom you need to put in a little work.  Once you get a real job.  You will look back at your time in college and realize you had no idea what real work was like.  Study.  Besides you are paying for it.

9.  Going home over the weekend

It’s Friday so I am headed home… Mommy is going to take care of her big man on campus

After studying and going to class all week you are going to go home?  Are you fucking nuts?  Last I checked mom’s home cooking was less likely to get your laid than going to the mixers down on Frat Row.  Homesick?  Grab a case of beer.  Cured. College is about the experience as much as it is about the classes.

7.  Gambling
Too many college students end up with a little extra cash and decide that they can quickly double their money.  Twice the money twice the fun; right?  There are a couple students on campus that will be playing bookie and they offer a convenient means by which to place a quick bet on that late night BYU-Arizona State game.  In case you have not read some of my other posts where I discuss the pleasures and evils of gambling let me put it right out there.  Two things you will learn after gambling: 1.You will swear that all the games are fixed and 2. You will wish you had all the money you lost gambling back.  These two lessons are especially acute for the poor college student.  Just spend you money are beer forget the get quick rich scheme.

6.  Saving money by not buying the books

…and that comes to $753.34 and your first born male child.

You figure you don’t need all the books, you can take some of them out of the library or you can share one with a buddy in your class.  Guess what genius, there are a dozen other people who are planning to take the book out of the library but little do you know that someone took it out last year and then sold it as a used book for beer money.  Sharing a book?  Good luck cramming for that midterm.  I know that 200 bucks for a book is highway robbery but you want to pass the course right? Look at it this way. If you are spending 20K plus on a year of college then 200 bones is a drop in the bucket.

4.  Having a Long Term Relationship
It’s College.  You got four years to live it up.  Five if you screw off too much but still keep it together.  There are thousands of potential hook ups at your school. You should be on a catch-and-release program.  Meet people.  Hang with them for a while and then meet other people.  You need to learn what you want out of a relationship.  This is a great time to do just that with other people on an equal footing.  Don’t pass it up. You don’t know what love is. Don’t get caught up looking for it.

3.  DO NOT OPEN A CREDIT CARD!!!
If you learn nothing else from today’s posting this is the one nugget of information that you should not forget. DO NOT OPEN A CREDIT CARD. Every credit company in the world is on your campus looking to push credit cards into your bong water soaked pockets. You don’t have a source of income and are living off of the fumes left from a summer job so why is American Express giving you free shit to sign up? Because they know you will run it up. Over draw. Not pay and then get bailed out by mom and dad. This cycle will ruin your credit scores and will punish you later in life. The credit card companies are predatory pricks looking to destroy you. This can make it harder for you to get an apartment after college or worse, fuck with your student loans. DO NOT GET A CREDIT CARD!

2. Drink the wrong stuff

Urinal cakes are not a hang over cure…

Everclear.  What can go wrong with that? Grain alcohol is cheap and making jungle juice is fun (as well as being liquid panty remover) but it can kill you. As a college student you probably don’t have a real clear idea of what your body can take or how it processes the rot gut you seem intent on giving it. Of all those students that die from alcohol poising every year, I can guarantee you that not one died from drinking beer. Funneling a bottle of Vladimir Vodka might impress your buddies but it is not worth the charcoal and stomach pumping. Beer is an effective alcohol delivery device and it will help you determine what you can take. Stick to beer. Beer is your friend.

1. Not having fun

We’re going streaking!!!

This is the best four years of your life. Use it. Have fun. Drink. Meet people. Hook up. Run naked through the quad. Go to football games and get tanked in the parking lot. Learn how to break into the campus swimming pool and have a late night dip. Stay up too late talking about nothing. Just do it all. If you don’t you will regret it and by then it is too late.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Jerk Store: The Woman Who Drives Really Slowly in my Parking Garage

Just park the damn thing already!!!

Why she is a jerk:
Dear 40-something woman in the tan CR-V that drives painfully slow in my parking garage.  I hope you get run over by your own car.  At 8:00 in the morning people are only driving into the parking garage to park.  No one is leaving the garage.  Your painfully slow pace of driving, stopping at every turn and beeping before going around the two lane turn up a level is slowly killing me.  How can you be so paralyzed by fear when driving and still do it every day?  I have never seen anyone drive so freaking slow during a morning commute in my entire life.  But somehow I end up behind you at least twice a week.  By the way, please stop trying to back into a space with your compact SUV.  You could not park a Schwinn in a twelve foot wide parking slot in an open field.  What makes you think you can put a car into a tight parking lot space in reverse?  Your two attempts to park with the mirrors before giving up and going up a level is going to force to me plow into your drivers side at 30 mph if you don’t give it up.  How the fuck can it really take you 20 minutes to navigate a simple, run-of-the-mill parking garage?  That line of cars behind you?  Each has a driver wishing death upon you and your household.  I have actually considered getting out of my car and offering to valet it for you.  Anything to get you to move.  Please either give up getting behind the wheel or start taking the bus.  Anything.  I am begging you.  Until then, welcome to the Jerk Store.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Jerk Store: Callie Rogers

Half a million bucks worth of blow… How did she not OD?

Why she is a jerk:
You probably don’t know Callie Rogers.  She is from jolly old England and six years ago at the age of 16 she won 1.9 million pounds or nearly three and a half million dollars American.  Not the largest jackpot but certainly more than enough to change your live.  Today, six years later, Ms. Rogers is broke. It is not unusual for a lotto winner to blow it all but this one is interesting because Ms. Rogers blew the majority of her money on blow.  That is a lot of eight balls!  The now mother of two is blaming the English government for allowing her to have access to her winnings at such a young age.  After winning she went on a constant spending spree that involves: breast implants, coke, designer cloths, coke, fast cars, coke, elaborate family vacations and did I mention coke?  The girl has a serious problem and literally blew most of her money up her nose.  In all honestly I kind of feel bad for Ms. Rogers.  The people around her are the biggest Jerks.  That being said she is the one that kept blowing the cash.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat

Jerk Store: Anthony Miller and his Wife

When I went to say “pass the salt honey” it came out as… “You ruined my fucking life you bitch!”

Why they are jerks:
Once again you probably don’t know Mr. Miller or his complete bitch of a wife, but earlier this week Miller was sentenced to 3-6 years of preison for robbing a bank in Ephrata PA.  When asked why he robbed the bank Miller responded that he did it to get away from his wife.  Miller’s wife is such a horrific bitch that he decided to go out and commit a crime so as to avoid having to leave her.  Miller went into a local Wal-Mart bought a BB gun and held up a bank because he did not have the heart to leave the insufferable bitch that is his wife because she threatened to kill herself with pills if he ever left.   Miller got sentenced to 3-6 years for his crime.  The highlight of the story came about halfway through this LancasterOnline.com article.  “Miller’s defense attorney, Robert Beyer, said that when the woman, now Miller’s ex-wife, came to pick up his car after he was taken into custody, she met with the arresting officer.  After 20 minutes with her, the officer said, “I was ready for jail, too,” Beyer dryly noted.”  Priceless.  For all this.  Miller and his ex-wife are both jerks.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…
Bearcat